7 Life Lessons from Boarding School

By Diana Chang

Everything I learned about life, I learned at boarding school.

At 15, I waved goodbye and sobbed as my mom drove away in our Ford Explorer. Here I was, in a foreign environment, suddenly feeling small in the middle of endless rows of evergreens, about to start school in this supposed “home away from home.” I say “supposed” because upon my arrival, I couldn’t appreciate all that was before me. Especially since I wasn’t on board with boarding school, and the separation from my old friends made me feel displaced. Worse, the idea of mandatory activities like sports and fine art that awaited me every day after formal classes made my stomach turn. Yet, I would soon grow to look forward to these, with new friends, and new memories that made boarding school the best thing that happened to and for me.

My parents knew something I didn’t, because my dad and uncles were S.L.O.B’s, “Shawnigan Lake Old Boys” from Shawnigan Lake School. I continued this path of family legacy because they benefited first-hand, from the value of such an education - one that taught me the most important life lessons that continue to shape and impact my life:

Distilled here are seven lessons that will last you for the rest of your life.

Outside our Chapel, there was this beautiful Quad area that our gardeners attended to every day. Our Headmaster would call students out who cut across the Quad and trample on the freshly cut grass. My first lesson was thus two-fold: 1) never take shortcuts and 2) never disrespect someone else’s work or effort.

Possibly my biggest pet peeve to this day are people who aren’t on time. At boarding school, I learned the hard way when I was 5 minutes late to breakfast sign-in. The consequence for something that didn’t seem like a big deal? I had to run hills one evening and shout, “I will never be late to breakfast sign-in again!” Punctuality isn’t just about time-management or self-discipline, more importantly, it signifies that you respect the person you’re meeting.

Smart casual is common colloquial at Shawnigan as criteria for special events, to be defined as nice trousers, collared shirt, and no jeans. At work and in life, I remind myself to dress for the job I want, not the job I have. This still boils back down to respect: if we make an effort in our appearance, exercise, and concern ourselves with proper self-care, it correlates to our own level of self-respect. Having proper etiquette is equally important – table manners, holding the door open, having good posture – take time to observe and understand the context you’re operating within and make conscious efforts.

The friendships I formed at Shawnigan remain some of the closest relationships I have to this day. Luckily, I come from a family that is tight-knit and close, but at boarding school, I was able to grow my ‘family’ exponentially through shared experiences, mutual elation and disappointments, championships and competitions.

Above all, Shawnigan’s character-centric education taught me to think of others and give back in whatever way you can, to make the world a better place in your own way. It’s no surprise that staff at Shawnigan consistently achieve 100% giving to the Annual Fund and there are countless trips worldwide and locally where students contribute their time, energy, and effort for the betterment of our world. Going to Thailand to help build a learning centre was eye opening in more ways than one and what inspired my delve into global development at university. I’ve always sat on a board of a non-profit, volunteered, and donated to causes close to my heart. This articulation and communication of empathy was learned at boarding school.

Shawnigan isn’t just about academics. It’s a balancing act of discovering, then combining other elements that make up who you are. Photography, musical, dance, rugby, squash, volleyball, ice hockey, yearbook, orchestra, robotics, visual art – eons of after school activities to choose from each semester meant you got to know people outside your grade level with shared interests. We had Sport four times a week and Fine Art twice a week. To this day, I balance and enrich my schedule by mandatorily scheduling activities like squash, running, or yoga, and piano or singing into my day to day life. Shawnigan prepared me for the real world and reminded me to manage my time in a such a way that I would be able to achieve my version of balance and a full life. Just as school isn’t everything, neither should your identity be pigeonholed strictly to your job.

Chapel was a regular and weekly highlight. We would listen to non-denominational lectures from the Reverend, celebrate recent sport achievements, and celebrate dean’s list recipients. Year after year, we were reminded that singing is cool – and it is! We are all made up of energy, and singing converts stored energy into kinetic energy and the vibrations we send out are instant mood-lifters.There’s a whole lot of science behind this, which is the foundation of music therapy. Expressing yourself and creating music together is one of my fondest memories at Shawnigan and I always try to visit on a Chapel Day because I miss the ‘voice in the Wilderness’.

In hindsight, being dropped off and waving goodbye to the Explorer was the best thing that ever happened to me. How I operate and live my life today is a direct result from my boarding years.

Our teenage years count as the most formative. Boarding school takes us on a journey that challenges us, nurtures us, celebrates us, and sets us on a path that validates who we are, while shaping us to become the best possible versions of ourselves.

We will each distill our own life lessons, above are mine. May they be of benefit.

Diana (Kaye’s ‘06) is a proud Shawnigan ‘SLOG’, and returned to represent the School during their Centennial year based in Hong Kong as their external relations associate. Her two brothers, father, two uncles, and cousin are all proud Shawnigan graduates.