By Diana Chang
🌿 Are silver linings a delusional optimist’s justification to make light of a tough situation?
I had just left a dream job of 3.5 years to head up partnerships for a San Francisco Ed Tech when I was one of the 25% impacted by layoffs mere months after taking on the new gig. I felt a multitude of mixed emotions, among them, shame and embarrassment. Did someone just break up with me?
After a few weeks of a self-indulgent pity party, rife with ramen at odd hours, an internal dialogue laced with criticism, Netflix binges (any Harlan Coben), it started to feel too comfortable in this land of non-productivity. And from experience, being too comfortable is never a good thing.
✈️ So, I packed a carry-on, left my laptop and credit card behind (cash only because #responsibility 💁🏻♀️), and hopped on a one way flight to Hong Kong. I scoured bookyogaretreats.com for my next pit stop, launching headfirst into dwindling resources and increasing anxiety. It was a crash course in frugality and resilience, but I trusted that with yoga’s breath work, paired with a technology disconnect, I’d find my way back to myself, to make space to listen to my heart.
Here’s a collection of my learnings which I hope can serve you if you’ve been laid off, or are simply exploring your next chapter. Heads up: uncertainty and anxiety are requisite ingredients to level you up, into your well-deserved realm of calm and clarity.
Flight Control & Self Alignment
Take a minute to pause, cultivate space for silence.
Breathe. Turn inward. Reassess current and new priorities, shifted values.
Process with mind, body, soul. Mind: Does it align with my career goals? Is this a smart move and the trajectory I envision for me? Body: Do I feel safe to be myself? In what ways will I grow? Soul: What impact can I help create? Does this environment elevate or diminish?
On Advice: Listen and collect wisdom from all walks of life, but filter rigorously. Collate, trash, and treasure. Some advice, solicited or not, simply won’t be relevant.
Ask tons of questions: Who are the people: team, board, clientele, demographic served? How do my personal and professional goals intersect? How happy am I with my life right now? What hobby brings me most joy?
System Activation
If writing your cover letter doesn’t excite you, stop. Don’t waste energy on anything half-heartedly.
It’s perfectly okay if new priorities look more like this: forest walks, sports, friends; impactful, fun, interesting, than that: salary, title, career progression, bonuses.
Don’t rely on travel to ‘escape’ (still recommend a yoga retreat) because we already have all the tools and wisdom we need, inside.
Lean into family, friends, journaling, movement, music, arts, [insert any hobby], for nourishment. Or hide in your cave of darkness, but please, don’t make a home in it.
Don’t feel embarrassed to ask for help because your network is more supportive, kind, and powerful than you could ever imagine.
Keep checking-in with yourself: audit your meetings, audit your gut, audit the people you meet. Make necessary adjustments to preserve energy and time.
Pre-launch Checks
When interviewing, flip the script and interview them back, but don’t waste their (and your) time on technical questions that yield a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer.
A consistent one I ask: “How do you describe the team culture and competency aside, what are you looking for?” Top marks for these answers, in my books:
Someone who wants to grow and is curious.
Someone who is different and will stretch the team to new heights.
Competent sunshine.
Someone who knows themselves (personal fave).
Collect your data points and visualize your notes; have nerdy friends (thanks, CL) who share their resources like this matrix.
Map out your ideal day: How does it start? What projects do you get to work on? What activities bring you the most joy? What do you need to make more space for?
Lift-Off
🚀 After a rickety Q2, I’m pleased to roll into Q3 with a renewed sense of personal purpose, grace and deeper self-awareness as my guiding forces. Gratitude for the compassion across the globe that I felt in spades, and the gamut of gems who reminded me of my potential and power. We’re back to making every single day a joyous party - from abundance to zest & every letter in between.
Happiness, after all, is a by-product of habits, not a finite goal.
🌸 Oh, if you’re curious where I’m channelling my energy towards, read my LinkedIn announcement. And yes, silver linings may not be noticeable or present, but you can always create your own.
May you turn inward to unearth the diamond that you are. Remember, the light always returns.
Finally, here's a poem I wrote for you:
🎋Nature threw unpredictable curve balls & alterations, lucky for us, we’re malleable as we are antifragile.
Fluidity > Rigidity.
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✨To have a mission, not a job, because hustle’s finish line has to be for the greater good.
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🚣♀️To be implacable in purposeful pursuit of fulfilment/knowledge, whatever our personal quest is. Relentless passion, unyielding devotion, so long as it doesn’t question Integrity.
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🚶♀️Our willingness to boldly walk into the unknown, not allowing fear of uncertainty limit an ounce of our life’s experience,
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🐚To listen, yes, and read & reflect, but not to forget to enjoy each incremental step of our journey.
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⚓️Solitude, a sanctuary for assured introspective recharge,
Because it’s true that without connection to self, connection to others is an impossible feat,
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🏔To be insatiably curious about the journey within, because when we fixate on external peaks to scale or romanticize escapes to faraway lands, we’re faced with the same challenges, regardless of sunny, sleety, or rainy climes. “If you travel within, you’ll travel the wide world and beyond.”
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📝Associate with those who can improve you. Retire into yourself often. And my all time favourite line Seneca penned, “If you wish to be loved, love.”
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🪴Rich Roll and Srimati’s wisdom in communication to connect, not correct. That passion takes practice. And to never short change what makes you happy.
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🌎Taleb’s take on modern stoicism, to “transform fear into prudence, pain into information, mistakes into motivation, desire into undertaking.” To propel forward, not to obsess over faults.
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🧘🏻♀️Susan David’s reminder that how we deal with our inner world drives everything.
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🌊Heraclitus’ motif that “We cannot step twice into the same river”, so why would we not courageously fall forward.
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🖤And of course, Shafak’s eloquence always prevails: Love cannot be explained, it can only be experienced. Love cannot be explained, yet it explains all.
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Drop me a note if I can assist in any way or explore one of DCC’s coaches to brush up on your writing or interview skills. ✨Feel free to follow along on my bumpy ride as I keep falling forward and having fun.
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